Remembering
by Marauders Chick
Summary: He tried to forget he knew how to block the memories out. All he had to do was put a walllike barrier up in the back of his mind. But sometimes, when Ginny was asleep,he’d pull out a single picture. And slowly, he would take down the wall and remember
1. Default Chapter

Hey! I really wanted to write this! I wanted to put some Hermione/Ron perspective, but this was a HARRY pov thingie. *sigh* oh well..maybe I'll do a second chapter up with that...nah, never mind. I think I like this the way it is. I hope it's good.  
  
Disclaimer: Do I have to? Arg..I dun own these characters. I wish I did. At least Ron. MUST YOU CONTINUE TO RUB IT IN????  
  
The war was over. The dark was gone, and the light was rebuilding. Some had even started to pretend that the war had never happened. Everybody certainly talked that way. For a few, the loss that had been suffered was still fresh in their minds.  
  
He tried to forget- he knew how to block the memories out. All he had to do was put a wall-like barrier up in the back of his mind whenever he felt those thoughts begin to creep into his head.  
  
Everybody thought he was happy. After all, it had been five years. "Plenty of time to mourn," everybody said. Harry would shrug, but inside he seethed. They hadn't lost two of the most important people in their lives.  
  
Some nights, Ginny would come to him tiredly, her brown eyes sleepy and her flaming red hair messy. "Are you all right?" she would ask. Behind her sleep filled eyes, he knew she was missing them too, and needed to talk as much as he did. But every time she asked he would always nod, and say, "Yes. Don't worry about me."  
  
She would sigh, but she would say no more.  
  
Later, when Ginny was asleep, he'd pull out a single picture from a drawer in the bottom of the bureau. It was torn and faded, though it was only six years old. It was all three of them together- Hermione, her brown curls flying as she tried to get Hogwarts, a History from Ron, who was grinningly holding it high above her. He, Harry, was watching them both in amusement, laughing at Hermione's attempt to take it from her tall friend.  
  
And slowly, he would take down the wall and remember.  
  
He remembered, in searingly painful detail, the day they had died. It was seventh year; their last day at Hogwarts.  
  
Ron and Hermione had been dating for a year by then, after realizing what had been obvious to everybody else for years. Ron had confided to Harry that that night, he was planning on proposing.  
  
That day, they had all been sitting by the lake together, gazing wistfully at the squid, which was lazily doing a lap around the lake. Hermione was leaning against Ron, who sat in the middle of the three. Harry had been lying down, just starting to doze, when abruptly Ron asked,  
  
"Do you think things will ever be like this for us again?"  
  
Harry sat up as Hermione looked up at Ron.  
  
"What do you mean?" asked Harry, though he felt he already knew.  
  
"Like this. With us- I dunno-" He looked a bit sheepish. "Being ourselves."  
  
Somehow, they all understood what Ron meant. And none of them had the answer.  
  
That night after dinner, a pale, worried looking Ron made a thumbs-up at Harry, and he grinned. He had a feeling that he knew what his other friend would say, but he wouldn't get his hopes up yet.  
  
As he went into the Gryffindor common room he sighed. Tonight was his last night at Hogwarts. He couldn't believe it. He touched the familiar tapestry on the wall. The seven years had gone by so fast...  
  
"Harry." A voice said softly. He looked up to see Ginny looking at him intently.  
  
He felt that peculiar jolt in his chest he had been feeling a lot around her lately. He tried to smile at her.  
  
"Yeah, Ginny?"  
  
She cleared her throat and straightened, her chin up boldly.  
  
"I just wanted to tell you, before you leave that I-I- love-"  
  
He felt joy surge through him. She was going to say it, he knew she was.  
  
"HARRY!!!" A voice screamed.  
  
His eyes wrenched away from Ginny to look at a sweating, crying Parvati.  
  
"Harry, you have to go to the Great Hall now, Dumbledore says, oh please come!" she cried, tears streaming down her cheeks.  
  
He ran, Ginny at his heels. When he reached the great hall he stopped dead. Cold ice ran through his veins.  
  
Several people lay dead, strewn on the ground. Several people were crying. "What- what happened?" he asked, looking around wildly. Where were Ron and Hermione?  
  
"Harry." Said Dumbledore, coming to him, eyes tired. "I'm very sorry."  
  
"Where are Ron and Hermione?" asked Harry stiffly.  
  
"Harry- death eaters-"  
  
"Where are they?" he asked, louder. Where were the familiar heads of chestnut and copper? He didn't see them.  
  
"They-"  
  
Harry ran to the Gryffindor table, searching frantically for his friends.  
  
"Where are Ron and Hermione? Have you seen them? Did they leave? Where are they?" he asked everybody. They all shook their heads at him sadly and looked away, many with tears in their eyes.  
  
Ginny gasped softly behind him, and pointed a trembling finger. He looked to where she pointed and saw them. There they lay, side by side, clutching each other's hand, looks of shocked horror on their faces.  
  
Harry's legs gave in, and he fell to his knees. He couldn't feel anything. Then he turned slowly to Dumbledore and asked, in a deadly calm voice,  
  
"Where are the bastards who did this?"  
  
"I don't know," the old man said, shaking his head. Harry saw tears glisten in the old man's eyes. "They dissaperated-"  
  
"YOU CAN'T DISSAPERATE AT HOGWARTS!!!!!!!" Harry roared, his face screwed up in rage "HERMIONE SAID, AND SHE WAS ALWAYS RIGHT!! ALWAYS!"  
  
"Dumbledore shook his head and turned away.  
  
"Harry-" It was Parvati again, wiping her eyes furiously. "I forgot to tell you- they were about to see you to-to tell you that she-she said yes."  
  
Harry shook furiously. He was beyond rage. Every fiber of his being told him to get revenge.  
  
The next day he had found Voldemort and killed him. The rage in his heart had allowed him to fight as he had never before. And the prophecy was over; light had won.  
  
He had gone back to Grimmauld place; Upon his death, Sirius had left it to him. Ginny had been there, and she told him that she loved him. Harry knew he should be happy, but he felt nothing.  
  
The next year, the two were married. That day Harry had wept; it was Hermione and Ron should have been there, married. Ron should have been the best man, Hermione the maid of honor. Where they should have been, Luna and Seamus took their places. Where there should have been warmth that day, Harry only felt a void.  
  
He still felt nothing for the redheaded woman, after these four years, though she was good and kind and loving to him. She had tried to talk with him, but he had pushed her away. She had been patient, but Harry knew she would go mad if things continued like this. He knew that she would leave him soon; she was not one to put up with such things. Deep down, Harry knew she deserved better. He acknowledged that he would be alone, and accepted it. He had felt alone for a very long time now.  
  
Tears would almost well up in his eyes, which was what told him his time was up.  
  
He would then put the picture back in the drawer and the wall in his mind back up. That was quite enough remembering for one night.  
  
~Fin~  
  
So was that all right? Please let me know! 


	2. IMPORTANT AUTHOR'S NOTE

Whoops! I think I made a bit of a booboo in the story..well actually, I didn't really, but I should explain(having not explained being said booboo):  
  
What really happened is that the death eaters used a portkey to get out of Hogwarts. That small bit was kinda to show that Dumbley is in fact getting older and more senile (never thought you'd see him senile, didja?) and that it really was up to Harry to end the war (as we already knew)  
  
The reason that I didn't go into much detail of the time between their deaths and when he killed Voldy is that, in my world at least, it was a bit of a blur to Harry too, and it was one of those "black out, next thing you know you're washing the blood of your hands things" (haha, Chicago!)  
  
So...yeah. Now I feel better having properly explained everything! 


End file.
